I just had an immensely weird and mildly amusing experience, and I thought I’d share it.

I was just outside the lab sitting under this short tree. I was kneeling down leaning against the tree. There was a chipmunk (Alfonzo – I’ve seen him about once a day for two years) digging for nuts and whatnot about 15 feet away. All of a sudden a robin flew down about five feet away, and while cautiously watching me proceeded to catch an earthworm from the mulch around the tree. There was a large crust of bread about ten feet away that had been there all morning (between the bird and the chipmunk) and the Robin flew straight to it and, I shit you not, he began making an earthworm and bread-crust sandwich. Actually, it was more like a salad. But he would break up the bread, then tear the worm, then pick up a piece of the worm with a piece of the bread and eat it. I was just sitting their mouth agape at this freaking bird reinventing the sandwich.
It was disturbing I tell you.

But there is more.

About five seconds later Alfonzo the chipmunk stands on his hind legs (as they are wont to do) and looks directly at me. He then runs to about 2 feet away from me, stops and looks at me again. I tried to be relatively still to see how close he would come (I assumed he didn’t realize I was there). After staring at me a few seconds he walks up to my foot (keep in mind I am kneeling close to the ground) and he puts his front paws on my shoe, flattens his body to the ground, looks up at me, and begins waving his tail in this methodic left-right fashion while staring right at my face. He does this for about five seconds before slowly sauntering off to look for more nuts. I swear to god he was trying to tell me something (probably something like “hey you – I know you”, or “why the hell are you always hangin’ round my crib?” or maybe he was saying “damn you’re one large fine-ass specimen of a man – for a chipmunk”). He could have been saying that – really – maybe he’s retarded and doesn’t know the difference.

I’m still not sure if all this really happened or I’m just going insane. Or maybe God is just screwing with me. It would be a pretty funny joke. I’d be doin’ all sorts of crazy shit like that if I were God.

Imagine walking around a corner to find three raccoons playing jump rope.

Anyway, I hope you’ve enjoyed my tale.